


The way you move is rude

by sandyk



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Post-Spider-Man: Far From Home, Talking about dick size a bunch, basically fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:08:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23204479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: It's ridiculous that Peter and MJ are still together. It's ridiculous Peter's been Spider-man for ten years! (Not including the Blip.) The things that MJ's mind wanders to while she tries to sleep.
Relationships: Michelle Jones/Peter Parker
Comments: 4
Kudos: 93
Collections: Trope Bingo: Round Fourteen





	The way you move is rude

**Author's Note:**

> Not mine, not profit garnered. Thank you a!!!! Title from snoh aalegra's you got me. For the trope bingo spot curtain fic.

MJ wakes up a little when Peter gets into bed and immediately plasters himself against her back. He also says "it's me," mumbling into her neck. 

"Don't tell my other boyfriend," she says. 

"You make that joke a lot," he says, clearly six seconds away from falling asleep. 

"You keep thinking it's a joke," MJ says. "How was your night?"

"This one guy had a machete," Peter says. He sounds excited. He's been Spider-man for ten fucking years. Ten years not including the five years of the Blip, when he wasn't anything at all. MJ still has some of the same hobbies she had when she was fourteen, but none of MJ's hobbies are life-threatening. Ten years is such a long time. 

They've been together for a real long fucking time, too. Turns out they're both really bad at being broken up. It's seriously stupid MJ is a college graduate who is still having sex with the first person she ever had sex with. That's not right. No one finds the person they'll spend the rest of their life with at age ten and starts dating them in high school. 

MJ knows that's not technically true and it does happen, but she thinks it's ridiculous it's happening to her. 

Peter sneaks his hand up under her shirt and tugs her closer. She says, "You're naked, huh? So now we're going commando in the suit."

"It's actually easier, I made some tweaks in the way the suit …" He trails off.

"You're literally falling asleep talking about the suit, dork," MJ says. "How exhausted are you? Go to sleep, baby."

"Trying," he says. 

She falls back asleep. 

MJ wakes with a start. She's miserable and insecure and shivering. Peter says, "Just a nightmare."

"More like a bad dream," MJ says. "Basically. We did that episode of the podcast on it and --"

"Hmmm, mmm," Peter says. "I listen to all your episodes."

MJ shifts to laying on her back with Peter using her stomach as a pillow. "I feel like you should have more nightmares."

"Yeah, I suck," he mumbles. "It's two am, we should go back to sleep."

"You have so many more things than me to have bad dreams about," she says. She rubs his hair in a vague manner. 

"Yeah, nothing bad or awful ever happens to you," he says. "I'm kidding."

"Upsy-daisical," she says, pulling on his arm. "Spooning."

He grumbles but then he moves again once she gets on her side. He's all over her. One of his many lovable skills. He wiggles against her and says, "Stop thinking. Sleep, MJ."

Hot, sometimes bossy, good in bed. She doesn't have a ton of comparison, but she has some. The closest she has ever come to revealing Peter's secret identity is actually this time on the subway when she was stuck next to three obnoxious college students who were utterly convinced Spider-man had to have a small penis. She was so close to screaming at all them and showing everyone on the train the two dick pics she'd gotten from Peter. She didn't but she was very brusque as she got off at her stop. She also didn't tell Peter. 

He doesn't have some wild porn star penis but MJ is not interested in something huge inside her like that. Plus he has super strength and that is honestly just actual nightmare fuel. She really appreciates that Peter has a nice penis. A very nice penis, she thinks, giggling. 

"What's funny?" 

"You, sex, the usual," MJ says.

"Me and sex is funny?" He doesn't sound offended. He sounds sleepy. 

"I'm horny argumentative, it's a mood, whatever," she says. 

"In the morning," Peter says. 

When she wakes up, the alarm is going off. "Peter," she says, reaching for her phone, "don't smash the phone again." She reaches out and turns off the alarm. 

"I did it once," he says.

"Three times," MJ says, sitting up. "You've smashed my phone three times." She gets up and goes into their bathroom. Peter follows her in. His hair looks utterly absurd. She loves that. She also loves the view. He has a nice butt, too. She says, "Did machete guy actually slash you?" She traces a healing pink line down his back. There's dried blood, too. "Ugh, did you get that on the sheets?"

"You got blood on the sheets again," she says. "In most relationships, it's the person who menstruates who does that."

Peter comes up behind her. "It's not that bad."

"Let's have sex," MJ says. "But not on your gross blood stains."

"They're going to come right out," Peter says. 

He's on top of her and it's great. She closes her eyes and her toes curl and she reaches for his butt. She loves his butt. Peter thrusts in and touches her and she comes. He comes after and then he's weighing her down and she loves that, too. He kisses her jaw. She kisses him and then gets out from under him. "Me first," she says. 

She showers, brushes her teeth, and when she walks into the bedroom, Peter is already stripping the sheets. He turns from spraying the blood stains with some homemade Peter Parker concoction and actually leers at her as she stands there, naked. He says, "These will definitely come out."

She pats his cute butt as she walks by to get dressed. Today is leggings, a t-shirt advocating prison abolition, and a hoodie she stole from Peter. She goes into her meditation space. It used to be the closet, but she converted it. She sits in the narrow space on the soft rug and puts on headphones. She meditates. She tries to meditate. She tries. Today she feels like she succeeds. Then she does some yoga stretches. She looks over the bed. Peter put on clean sheets and a new comforter. He's an excellent boyfriend. 

Peter's already started the coffee. He's dressed in black jeans and a button down blue shirt. He's making them both scrambled eggs and vegan bacon. Peter still eats meat, Peter eats everything to keep up with his metabolism. 

MJ is already looking at her phone. She started this podcast in college with her sophomore roommate, comparing what life is like for those who were blipped and those who weren't. Her roommate wasn't. It's been surprisingly successful. Peter says it's because MJ is compelling. She thinks it has more to do with her excellent research. Her cohost is pretty compelling, though. Between the patron payments and merch sales and her own freelance writing, she's making a living. She quit her job at the advocacy group last year and she's doing okay. She's mostly okay. 

Peter is covering all their bills. He works two days a week at Stark Industries in R&D and the rest of the week finishing up his double doctorate at Columbia. Plus, he has a ton of money Tony Stark left him. Peter only dips into that money for May. He takes care of her completely. He's a good boy like that. 

He leans over the island and kisses her. "Did you want to hear about the tweaks in the suit?"

"Not in the slightest," MJ says. "I bet Ned would love to."

"I already told him," Peter says.


End file.
